


Rites to Bind You and Hold You Up

by soleo_lion



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-05
Updated: 2015-06-26
Packaged: 2018-04-02 23:55:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4078783
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/soleo_lion/pseuds/soleo_lion
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As a 4th year, 1974 – a full moon coincided with Halloween. Being an auspicious occasion Lily and Severus take this opportunity to find their perfect match using a ritual they discovered in the restricted section of the library. They are confused when the image that appears before them seems to be the same person, James Potter. But perhaps that isn’t who Severus actually sees...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I started this as part of Halloween prompt from 2013 and it grew out of proportion. I’m hoping to see it through, but have been sidetracked greatly. It’s not all done, but I have enough that I wanted to share it with all of you. I know I’ve been gone a while – and I missed you all terribly. Please accept this chapter as my humble apologizes. Also this is unbeta'd so all mistakes are my own.

“Severus, we’re going to get in trouble if we get caught, so keep it down.” Lily was sketching out the runes in the correct pattern according to the arithmancy notes she had copied. Tucking her red hair behind her ear she looked down at the two circles on the floor satisfied with the results.

“I’m just worried that those Neanderthals are going to barge in here and ruin everything. Lupin was missing at the feast, and Potter and Black were looking nervous. They must be up to something.” Young Severus Snape was used to being teased by those ruffians, but if they appeared tonight his plans were all for naught.

They were working on a complicated spell, with interlacing potion. It was supposed to reveal your soul match and draw you to them. Severus was hoping that he would see Lily, and she would see him. The crush he was sporting for her was fierce and could easily be true love.

They had found the spell in the restricted section of the library last year when working on a potion for Slughorn. It had a lot of requirements; one of which was a full moon on Halloween, when the veil between realms was the thinnest. That way, your perfect match could be revealed with the least amount of interference. The potion amplified your magical signature, which made it call out to your match. If they were close by you’d be able to tell. Severus thought of it kind of like echo-location. Your magic bounced off of theirs allowing you to home in on them.

“Ok. I’m ready Sev. Do you have the potion?” 

He handed over the vial. “Be careful with that. I spent my whole summer allowance on those ingredients.” If he wasn’t shown Lily he didn’t know what he would do. There wasn’t anyone in this world that he wanted to be with more than her.

“I know. I helped you get some of them. Just sit down. It’s almost time.”

The integral part of the circles were the figure eights; they stood or sat on one, while their match would appear in the other. It also had ties to the eternal, so due to the magic of the spell their partner would appear the same age as the person casting the spell at the time. Lily had laid the circles down so they could face each other and also see who appeared in each other’s circle.

The clock in the corner of the room began to chime the hour. Severus and Lily downed their potions and began to cast the spell. They had practiced so they would both finish at the same time, not letting the other get out of sharing. The magic pulsed through the circle, gathering and making the chalk light up. Once the whole circle was filled with magic the light disappeared.

That’s when the ghostly figure appeared in the other circle.

Severus was shocked to be sure, as was Lily, as she gasped. They both saw the figure of James Potter, although Severus could see that his was shorter by a good inch. He stood to get a better look at the figure.

He couldn’t tear his eyes away from the hated face of his nemesis. The dark messy hair and the glasses were unmistakable. There was an unusual scar on his forehead though, and then he got a good look at the emerald eyes he knew so well, that already haunted his dreams. He took an involuntary step back, breaking the circle and causing the apparition to disappear back into the ether.

It couldn’t be. Could it? There must have been some kind of error in the spell, and hers must have bled over into his. Yeah. That must be what happened.

He looked over at Lily who was still staring at the translucent figure. He got closer, to see it from her angle. Yes that was James Potter alright the eyes were the right color. Now there was no way for Severus to win the hand of the girl that he loved. They both knew the spells’ successes far out-shown its failures. That was why they had wanted to try it in the first place.

“Do you feel it Sev? Did your magic call out?” She sounded far away, in her own world of flowers, rainbows, and love.

He recalled that his magic should have pinged back to him by now, if it had reached his fabled to be love interest. He felt nothing, empty. “No. It must not have worked. Maybe I shouldn’t have done it in the same room as you. Your spell must have interfered with mine.”

“I’m sorry Sev.” She finally looked at him, stepping out of the circle and wrapping him in a hug. He reveled in the brief closeness, in the silkiness of her hair as it was crushed against his skin and her smell as pure as the summer sun, before she pulled away.

“No matter. It must be that I am not destined to love.”

She cuffed his shoulder playfully. “Don’t be so melodramatic. Of course you’re meant to fall in love. And just because that spell showed me James Bloody Potter, doesn’t mean that I’m going to go falling in love with him tonight. He’s nothing but a bully and a showoff. I have no interest in getting to know him until he grows up a bit.”

They shared a smile of comradery and companionship.

“Thanks Lily.”

“Okay, let’s get this place cleaned up. It is way past curfew. And I don’t want to be the one to tell McGonagall what I’m doing out so late with a Slytherin boy.” They both blushed at the implications if they got caught out this late at night together.

Severus spent the rest of that night trying not to think of the boy he had seen; the boy with James’ face, but Lily’s eyes. It was his worst nightmare come true. James would one day win Lily’s love, and they would have a child. But any child of theirs couldn’t be destined for Severus, not with the animosity between him and the Gryffindor boys. He couldn’t think of anything that would cause his feelings about James Potter to ever change.

-/-/-/-/-/-

Twenty year old Severus had almost forgotten the one time dream of his fourteen year old self to marry Lily Evans. He was too busy these days becoming the youngest man in a century to complete his potions mastery. He was learning from the foremost brilliant mind of Italy currently, Antonio Moretti. He had been introduced by Lucius Malfoy at the Dark Lord’s bidding. They were expecting great things from Severus, and he didn’t want to disappoint knowing the man’s ferocious temper.

He had already secured his position to teach at Hogwarts in the fall earlier that year. It would allow him time to experiment on new concoctions. Although Albus had told him he would be ok to start without the mastery certificate Severus had made it a point to earn it before the fall. He was almost done with it. He just needed to complete this last complex potion.

Also his new position as spy to the Order of the Phoenix also kept him on his toes. He had only reported one thing of significance, but Albus was hoping he would soon become part of the inner circle, allowing him access to more vital information.

It was early morning on July 31st and he needed to pick up an ingredient for the brew he was working on. The batch he had was spoilt and he refused to work with inferior items, especially on something so important.

Upon arriving at the apothecary he became dizzy and stumbled. He caught himself on the shelves before he could tumble to the dirty floor. He felt his magic calling out and a brief echo reached back to him. He’d never felt anything like it before. He closed his eyes in the middle of the shop and tried to replicate the feeling.  When nothing happened he picked up the items he needed and left in a hurry. He had some research to do tonight while his infusion reduced.

It wasn’t until a week later when he was having tea with the Headmaster that he got an inkling of what must have happened. Dumbledore told him that Lily had given birth to her son Harry. The family was currently in hiding, as Voldemort had begun searching for them during the spring, but they were doing very well for all that.  The boy looked a lot like his dad, but already had Lily’s eye color.

He told Severus that he had gotten to see the child and was astounded by the depth of power he felt from the boy even at such a young age. It was no wonder the Dark Lord feared the idea of the boy.

Severus felt his face turn white as the conversation progressed. There was no way he was destined to be with Lily’s boy. None. He wouldn’t allow himself to be with a boy twenty years his junior. He was old enough to be the boy’s father. The infant was prophesied for greatness already, the boy who would defeat Voldemort.

Albus grew concerned that Severus was coming down with something when he continued to ignore his attempts to draw him into a discussion.

No one knew the truth. Lily even thought that her spell had interfered with his. He would just keep it to himself. Push the boy away if they ever came into contact. When, he corrected himself. He had a twenty year contract to the school starting in the fall. He would be the boy’s teacher at some point in the future. He would have time to prepare.

-/-/-/-/-/-

He felt the ping of his magic again next year on Halloween. Something had been off all day, but as night fell he knew for sure something was wrong. Voldemort had been planning something special for this year, although the details were known to only a few.

It was just before the feast that he felt the pull of magic. It felt almost like when the Dark Lord would call him from his dark mark, but different. He had to answer this call. He discreetly headed for the apparition point outside the school gates and let his magic pull him where it needed to be.

He arrived in Godric’s Hollow, and at first he couldn’t pinpoint anything amiss. After a few moments he saw it. There was one house that the door was blasted off, but none of the passersby noticed it. The shielding around the building melted away for him as he pushed passed the gate. As soon as he was cleared through he rushed inside. The front room was a mess, and the body of James Potter was lifeless against the wall.

This must be the Potter’s hiding place, but it should have been impossible for him to find it. Even Dumbledore couldn’t break into a location secured by a fidelis charm. The crying of a young child broke the unnatural silence of the home.

Upstairs he found the cold body of his one-time friend crumpled in front of the crib of her boy. Overcome by grief he dropped down to clutch at her still form. This was his fault, he knew. If only he could have been stronger he would have been able to protect her.

With tear filled eyes he finally looked up at young Harry. The boy knew something terrible had happened, his cries for his mama were heartbreaking. Laying Lily aside he took the sobbing boy in his arms, offering what little comfort he could. The boy calmed quickly, Severus’ own magic enveloping them warmly together.

“So you’re the one, hmmm.” Harry’s tear stained eyes opened, showing the most vivid green eyes just like his mother’s. “We’ll see.” Holding the toddler gently he put the boy back into his crib. “Someone will be here for you soon Harry, and they mustn’t find me here. You’ll be just fine.” Harry had other ideas, as he reached out and grabbed Severus by the robes, holding on tightly. “I’ll keep an eye on you, but I really must go.” He disentangled himself from the tiny hands and moved away. His magic wanted him to stay, but it would be worse in the long run if he did. At the door he took one last look at his fallen friend, and her beloved child.


	2. Year One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Assume that years one through four are unaltered from Harry’s perspective. Once we get to year five things will be AU – but I didn’t want anything romantic happening while Harry was too young. So this is a bit of what Severus was doing during those years waiting for Harry to grow up.

It wasn’t until ten years later that I laid eyes on the boy again. Dumbledore had refused to allow the faculty to have contact with him, sighting his need for protection against magical perpetrators and it had been kind of easy to forget about the ache in my heart when I didn’t have to see him every day.

I couldn’t see him immediately when he came in the Great Hall, he had been hidden by his taller counterparts. As his name was called and we all waited for the sorting hat to choose his house I could see that he was much smaller than average. Certainly James hadn’t been so scrawny at that age, and it was easy for me to picture his father with his unruly hair and oversized glasses. During the feast I catch his eyes on me. When our gaze lock my magic sings to me. It’s exhilarating. Too bad my mind and body react differently. He is after all a child and I am not a pedophile. If it weren’t for my magic’s reaction to his presence I could write the whole thing off as absurd.

Watching the scrawny eleven year old make his way out of his class room for the first time was much harder than he had anticipated. He almost called out to the boy to remain after class, tell him all the secrets he knew he shouldn’t. One look at the stuck up face of Draco Malfoy cured him of any imbecilic urges. He spoke to Lucius Malfoy often enough, he didn’t need his son tattling on him as well. He just had to keep picturing James Potter whenever he saw the boy and he would be able to get through this.

It was going to be a very long and tiring year. 

-/-/-/-/-/-

The boy couldn’t stay out of trouble. He wasn’t sure if he was seeking out excitement and adventure or if it just came to him naturally. There was no reason for him to be out so often after curfew, to be spying on testy potions masters, performing perilous Quidditch stunts, fighting trolls, or being in dangerous parts of the castle. How was he supposed to protect him if he kept running towards danger?

Luckily every day looking at him during meals was enough for now to satisfy that little part of him that longed for the boy. His magic urged him to spend time with the brat, but he was able to deny himself that easily. Dumbledore didn’t know about the ritual still, and he wanted to keep it that way.

He just had to keep up the act until summer. A couple of months away from distractions would do him good. Too bad Quirrell was insisting that he help him with tracking down some of his former associates. He said he had some questions about spells that the Dark Lord had used, but the timing seemed very strange. Only a couple weeks until the end of the year, he could do this.

-/-/-/-/-/-

Severus watched from the Headmaster’s Tower as the train left the station, and he stayed there long after he could no longer pretend that the smoke trail of the engine still appeared in the sky. Dumbledore let him remain lost in his thoughts until evening fell.

“He is a remarkable boy.”

He made a noncommittal sound, already giving away too much with his unusual interest in the Express’ progress.

“I do hope that next year it will be a bit more uneventful. All the excitement of this year made it very difficult for the children to focus on their studies.” Albus made a point of delicately popping a lemon drop in his mouth and offering one from the bowl to Severus.

“And whose fault is that Albus? You take his safety far too lightly. I can’t believe you sent him back to those Muggles after what Pomona told you of his health issues.”

The look of great sadness that passed over Dumbledore’s features did little to alleviate Severus’ fears. His heart did not cheer at hurting the older wizard considering the subject matter.

“As Mr. Potter proved in his encounter with the shade of Voldemort, the blood ward is keeping him safe. It must be kept in place and only by close proximity to his only living relatives is this possible. I wish there was another way.”

He didn’t want to stay here and listen to the excuses any longer. The old fool was going to get Potter killed. He would just have to be more vigilante in guarding the boy until something else could be done.

-/-/-/-/-/-

Summer holiday always began with his least favorite activity; celebrating Draco Malfoy’s birthday. He was required to attend the outrageous event every year. He maintained appearances but listening to Death Eaters going on and on about how much they hated the Potter-brat got tiresome even to the most devout. As Severus’ undisclosed soul bond it was even more grating. He made sure the hosts saw him but he left soon after. 

Severus made sure that he stopped by Privet Drive once a day to check on the boy, making sure to go unnoticed with a disillusionment charm. As June turned into July Potter got progressively more despondent. Those useless Muggles had him even tending the garden in the heat of the day. No owls came or went from his window, not that one could get in with the bars, which seemed odd as he was sure that he had made friends with those two Griffindors he was always hanging around with.

He wanted to spend every waking hour making sure the boy wasn’t harmed, but Albus still didn’t know about the soul bond ritual and he wanted to keep in that way so he kept away as much as he could bring himself to. He also had to keep up appearances for his former friends as well. The life of a spy was tiring, putting masks up for everyone that knew you.

When July 31 rolled around he found himself peeking in the front window around dinner, hoping to catch a glimpse of a birthday celebration. Instead the scene that unfolded had him reaching for his wand. He needed to calm down before he did something that would cause him to be sent to Azkaban. He knew those Muggles were no good. He needed to destroy something so he headed to Spinner’s end to vent some of his ire.

Thankfully a few days later those Weasley children saved Severus from killing the Dursleys which would have made the blood protection vanish. Maybe he would be a little less harsh on the twins next year, considering their assistance in the matter. Maybe.

-/-/-/-/-


End file.
